“You have heard that it was said to the people
long ago, ‘Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’
But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to
judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca’ is answerable to the
Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of
hell. Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember
that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of
the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your
gift.” (Matthew 5:21-25).
Jesus brought Christians to a
higher standard when he preached the will of God. “You have heard that
it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist
an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the
other also. And if someone wants to sue
you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well.” (Matthew
5:38-40). “You
have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I
tell you: love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may
be sons of your Father in heaven. He
causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and send rain on the righteous
and the unrighteous. If you love those
who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing
that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others?
Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is
perfect.” (Matthew 5:43-48).
Yes, Christ brought his
followers and believers to a whole new level of forgiveness through the
strength only God can give. I have truly
had my heart broken in to pieces. I have
felt the pain of someone who hurt me, wept full of sorrow where you have to
tell yourself to breathe. I have sat at the foot of the cross and laid each of
the ones who have scarred my heart there, asking Yeshua to fill me with the
forgiveness he prayed at the cross, “Father, forgive
them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34).
The New Testament is full of
scripture encouraging us to forgive. The
Apostle Paul writes to Philippi praying the
church come together for two Christian women.
First of all, it is embarrassing Paul had to address this situation, but
I do understand the reality of Christians at war with one another. We are to be
a light in a very dark world, epistles of the Word, ambassadors for Christ, yet
the world looks on to divisions in the church, Christians attacking one
another, cutting of friendships for an offense and the lukewarmness of a
loveless generation. My heart is
burdened for the church to love one another, forgive those who have painfully
broken our hearts and to find the peace only Christ can give.
Euodia and Syntyche were two women mentioned
in Philippians 4:2-3, “I plead with
Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord. Yes, and I ask you, local yokefellow, help
these women who have contended at my side in the cause of the Gospel, along
with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers whose names are in the book of
life.” These two women were Christians who had contended with Paul, side by
side planting the seed of the Gospel.
Whether through missions, providing for the Apostle, encouraging other
women to follow or opening a home to bible study, these women were followers of
Christ whom God entrusted with his Word.
Some way, division is brought
between these two women. Some where, the
enemy was able to find a crack in the foundation of one of these women and
planted a seed of strife. Some how, the
seed of strife grows in to an argument and the Apostle Paul hears the
situation; that should be of no shock to anyone of us. News by word of mouth travels at the speed of
lightening, especially in the churches.
I find it amazing how news of a sinful nature spreads like wild fire,
but news of a miracle or one accepting Christ as his/her Savior is
stifled.
In the Gospel of Mark 7:20-23 and Galatians
5:19-21, Jesus and the Apostle Paul list what comes out of a person that
makes them unclean. Christ said from
within our hearts come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder
adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. Inspired by the Spirit, the Apostle pens
sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery, idolatry and witchcraft, hatred,
discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambitions, dissensions, factions and
envy, drunkenness, orgies and the like are in a battle within our spirits. “For the sinful nature desires what is
contrary to the Spirit and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful
nature. They are in conflict with each
other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit,
you are not under the law.” (Galatians
5:17-18).
Each one of the above listed fleshly desires
can cause bitterness, an argument, division and hatred. Arguments occur for many reasons, but mostly
because we are offended by another’s behavior or lack of behavior. At times our annoyance, frustration or anger
is righteous, a godly anger as Christ had flipping over the tables in the Temple for the religious
had made God’s House into a den of thieves.
We expect Christians to behave as the bible commands and when they do
not, we are annoyed, offended and angry.
I have experienced this many times and have brought it to the cross or
my husband first. During these times I
was offended or hurt, Tommy would advise, offering counsel from a calm
perspective, while I attempted to receive from an irrational emotional
stance. I would pray, lay the situation
at the cross and wait a few days.
Many times, God would have may drop the
circumstance out of my own sensitive feelings being hurt or I was too easily
offended. This is my flesh growing and
having the peace of Christ to forgive.
These situations: someone forgetting a promise, a person making a rude
remark, someone dictating to me how she wanted to receive a blessing I was
giving to her, not receiving invites to friend’s outings, feeling used for
prayer or counsel and not for friendship, forgetting my birthday, being ignored
by those who are suppose to be loving in the church, rejected by those I had
helped are all examples to what I would lay at the cross, ask Tommy’s advise
and pray if I should say anything. Each
of these situations were kept in prayer, between the Lord and myself, but me
learning to not be easily offended.
There are some instances where you lay it down
and walk away, but then there are some we are to confront face to face. When I say face to face, I mean no emails,
texts, phone calls or letters. If there
is a delicate situation, where the Lord has asked you to mend, forgive and
bring to the attention of another, this requires gentle face to face prayer and
mending. According to James 1:19, “Understand, my believed
brethren, let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to take offense
and to get angry; for man’s anger does not promote the righteousness of God.”
My prayer is the situation be brought to the Lord first, your husband and wait
a few days before “mending”. “A self-confident fool utters all his anger, but a
wise man holds it back and stills it.” (Proverbs
29:11). “A man of wrath stirs up strife, and a man given to anger commits
and causes much transgression.” (Proverbs
29:22).
We are called to love one another as
Christ loved the church. We are asked as
long it is in our power to make peace, then we are to be the peacemakers not
repaying evil for evil, but overcoming evil with good (Romans 12:14-21). This
effort, emotion and response require humility. “As a prisoner of the Lord,
then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be
completely humble and gently; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Make effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” (Ephesians 4:1-3). Pride is a tremendous hindrance in settling
disputes between relationships. Who
believes who is right, who believes who is wrong.
We are to humble ourselves under the
mighty hand of the Lord, then he will lift us up and give us honor (James 4:10, 1 Peter 5:6-7). Give the
disagreement to the Lord, pray, and open the door for communication. We can not MAKE a person understand our
feelings, point of view or expect another to apologize. If a one on one conversation does not work or
the situation is not rectified, then pray about bringing it before a
pastor. If this person is a true friend
and Christian, one who feels the same about you desiring to overcome the
disagreement, the bringing the problem before a pastor should be
considered. “If your
brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of
you. If he listens to you, you have won
your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so
that ever matter maybe established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.
If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to
listen to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” (Matthew
18: 15-17). These are stern words from a Savior, but I do understand
strife, dissension, factions, arguments in the church cause division,
lukewarmness, gossiping, slander, etc making our witness futile.
I have not always been able to work
out disagreements with others. There
have been some situations I have cast aside due to my own easily offended
feelings, then there have been arguments were I have had to pray, seek the
Lord’s counsel as to address the person and then some situations just need to
be laid at the altar and God reconcile them for you. I had an argument with a family member, not
talking for years. It was so sad, but I
prayed and left the relationship at the cross. What I did not know was, the
other party had done the same thing. A
year later, God brought our relationship back together, standing on faith and
declaring we would never separate again.
I have had other disagreements with unbelievers and have asked the Lord
for guidance, prayed and lay it at the foot of the cross. Slowly these relationships have been built
back up, but at times I can feel myself very leery in allowing my feelings to
show. God will work out all things for those who love him and are called
according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).
I have
never experienced a church bring a member forward to open the debate to the
congregation. Although I have heard of
one account where molestation occurred between youths at a church camp; sadly the
situation was not rectified, members left the church, and the accused never
brought to accountability. I believe
these are rare instances, but as we draw closer to the end times, these
situations will occur more frequently.
I pray, my sweet sister, you have no Spirit of
Strife or divisions in your life. My
prayer is you quickly run to the cross, cast all your cares over to the Lord
and forgive the ones who have caused you hurt.
My prayer is your relationships are mended by the hand of God. My prayer is you grow stronger in the Word,
be transformed by the renewing of your mind, then being able to know what the
good, pleasing and perfect will of God is (Romans
12:2). My prayer is the church isn’t
easily offended, careless, loveless and lukewarm. My prayer is we are epistles and light to a
dark world, loving the ones who do not deserve our forgiveness for our sins are
forgiveness daily in the eyes of God. We
are to conduct ourselves in the same manner.
Let us Pray and
CONFESS the Word of the Living God:
Abba Father,
I want to
know you and the power of your resurrection.
My heart’s desire is to become more like you; purified seven times over,
humbling myself to your perfect will and plan.
I know the very people in my life are hand picked by you. I know my family and the friends you have
brought to me should be loved and cherished with prayer and thanksgiving, for I
have been blessed to not have walked with wicked or stand with sinners or have
sat with the mockers. I love your law
and I meditate on it day and night. I
desire to be a stream of living water bearing fruit in due season whose leaf
never withers but continues to grow strong and prosperous (Psalm 1:1-3). I know that
can not be accomplished if there is strife, anger, bitterness and division in
my life.
I pray for your healing hand to mend
the relationship between myself and __________________. I desire to be the peacemaker, to hold no
offense and bitterness for I know as long as it is up to me, I am called to
bless and pray for those who have hurt me.
I pray my mouth never cause a spark I can not mend or will regret the
next day. I pray I to be self controlled
in all situations, guarding my mouth and what I say to please you, but also to
not cause transgression or strife.
I cast this
relationship and all my care for you are my vindicator and redeemer. You hold
the truth and will testify for me and your judgment is just. I pray if I am to bring this disagreement
before a pastor or counselor, you will lead me to that person. I pray to be humble, gentle and Christ like
to __________________ so I can lead by example and he/she can see a true
follower of Christ. I believe you work
all things out for good for those who love you and are called according to your
purpose (Romans 8:28). I confess to be transformed by the renewing
of my mind so I will know your good, pleasing and perfect will for this
situation (Romans 12:2).
We are
called to love one another as Christ loved the church. We are asked as long it is in our power to
make peace, then we are to be the peacemakers not repaying evil for evil, but
overcoming evil with good (Romans
12:14-21). This effort, emotion and
response require humility, so as a prisoner of the Lord, I desire to live a
life worthy of the calling I have received. Being completely humble and gentle;
being patient, bearing with one another in love. I will make effort to keep the
unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace (Ephesians 4:1-3). I want to be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow
to take offense and to get angry; for man’s anger does not promote the
righteousness of God (James 1:19).
Thank you
for removing this seed of anger, bitterness and unforgiveness. I thank you for the cross, Christ’s precious
blood spilled for me. I pray I can be as
my Savior asking you to forgive ________________ for ____________does not know
what they are doing, but if I am the one who has committed an offense, I pray
to quickly mend and apologize for causing another one pain. Thank you Lord I can bring this to you, thank
you I can call you friend and thank you Lord for healing me heart. In Jesus
name I pray, Amen.
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