A simple question is asked, “A wife
of noble character who can find?” Let us ask the question again, this time OUT
loud and slower, “A wife of noble character who can find?” What if we ask two
questions of our own? Can my husband call me a wife of noble character? Could I call myself a wife of noble
character?
We are going to look at Proverbs 31
and see how we measure up today to this biblical wife of noble character. If we look at the twenty-two verses which
encompass this woman, could we honestly compare ourselves to this noble
wife? Let’s see.
Webster’s Dictionary defines noble
to describe the character of a person who is “having, showing, or coming from
personal qualities that people admire (such as honesty, generosity, courage,
etc.)” (Merriam-webster.com). “Character
is defined as the way someone thinks, feels, and behaves. (Merriam-webster.com). I think we should put
those two words together: noble character or a person who thinks, feels and
behaves with such honesty, generosity, and courage that other persons admire
them. This Proverb’s woman was admired
by her husband, children, community and God.
Far more precious than rubies or
any other gem stone, a husband would rather adorn himself with this woman than
any lavish, brilliant colored stone.
This woman far outshines any diamond in the rough, for her husband lacks
nothing and has full confidence in her bringing him good and not harm all the
day of his life. When Tommy walks out our front door, I want him to be full of
confidence in my ability to manage the children, the house, my work, my
relationship with Christ and any other task I need to accomplish that day.
Confident I can teach our children, manage the house including laundry, bills,
dishes, pantry stocked and chores done, I desire for my husband to lack no good
thing, but sadly, it wasn’t always like that.
I did have a life before
Christ. I lived twenty-eight years in
the world of selfishness, covetness, slothfulness and lacked confidence in my
own self. I had someone watch my
children for three hours everyday to get the well deserved “break” I needed. I
had someone clean my house for my once a week, we went out to dinner several
times a week and I just really wanted to do what I wanted to do. Tommy graciously supplied all of those things
because I was having some problems.
After Maddie I went through a post partum depression, but had no idea
that was what was wrong with me. I
thought I just couldn’t handle children and family life. On the outside, I could fool anyone, but at
home behind closed doors, I was truly a mess. A wife of noble character I was
not.
When Christ called me back to Him
in 2005, I surrendered all. I had a
vision of the Lord in January of 2005 while in the midst of a depression. I had cut my hair off to about an inch all
over, was 30 lbs over weight from pregnancies,
my emotions were OUT of control from laughing to crying hysterically or
throwing things in a selfish rage. But,
for the next decade, I was determined to learn the Christian life. I fell madly in love with Yeshua and His love
for me. I purposely desired to be this
Proverbs 31 woman who had the confidence of her husband, but more importantly
the confidence of Jesus who gave me my family to cherish and treasure. Once I was able to serve instead of self
serve, becoming this woman became easier.
For the last ten years, I have
spent time in prayer, reading the Word of the living God, gleaning from other
women teachers and seeking to change.
Determined to bring Tommy good and not harm, praying he lack no good
thing, God began to change and mold me into this wife of noble character. There were days I wanted to quit when I saw
and felt no change, but the overwhelming pull of Christ’s strength pushed me
forward. It was small steps that brought
lasting changes to my goal. The prophet
Zechariah penned it the best, “Do not despise the days of small beginnings”
Zechariah 4:10. A wife of noble character works with
eager hands to select wool and flax, bringing food from afar, providing for her
family and portions to her servant girls.
She makes linen garments and sells them and supplies the merchant
sashes. A noble wife plans her meals, giving to those in her household, working
hard for her family, searching for the best prices and making the most of her
time and money. She uses the family’s
finances wisely, reinvesting her earnings and making more. Her trading is profitable and her lamp does
not go out at night for she considers what she buys, planning her schedule to
best fit the family. Today we may say
she coupons, shops sale items, searches the internet for the best price before
purchasing and considers the value of the purchased product. A noble wife considers whether she can afford
an item instead of purchasing on credit cards, considers the importance of use,
and the value all the family can have with an item. This
wife works hard and her arms are not only strong for the task, but gentle
enough to open them to the poor. A noble woman finds time to exercise and give
to those who are in need. Some time
during her day, week or month, she gives to the poor and blesses those less
fortunate. As we progress with this woman of noble character, we see there is
little time for television, computer, ipad, twitter, face booking and the like.
This woman did not have those distractions, and they are distractions, to keep
her from the things of God. It is a
choice you will have to make. It is a
choice to get of the couch, turn the television off and decide to be this wife
of noble character. Will you make that
choice? Continuing,
when it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed
in scarlet. She makes covering for her
bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to
come. This wife is prepared. She has
enough self-control to prepare for the upcoming change of season or we could
say today, I’m financially prepared for six month if I loose my job. My kids would be fed, clothed, the house
would run properly, trusting God to provide work and looking as if have no
problems in the world. Several
scriptures come to mind as I write this.
In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus teaches from the mount, “Therefore, I tell you, do not worry about your life, what
you will eat or drink; or your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the
body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow
or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who
of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” (Matthew 6:25-27).
I believe the Proverbs 31 woman
does not worry about what will come. She
is prepared and she knows God will provide all the time. This wife doesn’t need to go around head
hanging low, depressed and sad about a sudden misfortune, but she straightens
up, head held high saying, “I am a daughter of the Most High! He knows exactly
what I need.” She has faith in being sure of what she hopes for and certain of
what she can not see (Hebrews 11:1).
Her husband is respected at the
city gate where he takes his seat among the elders of the land and she speaks
with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue. Her children arise and call
her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her. This family appreciates the
Word of God, has His favor and blessings.
How do I know? This noble wife’s husband was an elder, respected for his
opinion and wisdom. She too was sought
after for godly advice and counsel. She
always had something good and profitable to say, encouraging others and
training those in the way they should go.
I pray people seek you out for your reputation of a godly Christian
woman, who always has something nice, encouraging, and wise to say. Yes….a noble wife who can find??
I’ve met many women, most in the
church who I would no more confide in than a man and the moon. Isn’t that sad? Isn’t that an oxymoron? We
are to confide, pray, teach, admonish, encourage, and seek wise counsel, but at
times we find jealousy, backstabbing, gossiping and lies. I knew who I could trust when I needed
counsel and advice. I knew who would not
divulge my secret for “prayer purposes”.
How does your reputation precede you? Are you praised for being a godly
Christian woman?
I like verses 29-31, “Many women do
noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive and beauty is
fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward
she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.” Jesus
said it perfectly, “No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad
tree bear good fruit. Each tree is recognized by its own fruit.”
(Luke 6:43-44).
This woman is a Christian woman who
has her life in order, together and revered for her character qualities. Nicole,
you may say, I have no idea where to start becoming this wife of noble
character. Well, I would start in baby
steps. You start by asking God for the strength in Jesus Christ, you start by
prayer, you start by learning from other women and you start by reading the
Word of God. Over the years, I have
learned from other women, the Bible and the Lord showing me what makes my house
run efficiently. I have listed a couple
of pages of insights in to my own house and how I managed. This is by no means an exhaustive list, but
ideas to help you in which have saved me time and energy:
v
Get up early.
I was the first up every morning.
I knew how long it took for everyone to move about comfortably before it
was time to go with no rushing. One hour
before we left for school, everyone was up with breakfast, teeth, hygiene,
backpacks, lunches, soccer clothes, etc.
Those extra minutes started our days off right
v
Memorize a scripture a day. By the end of the
year, you could have 365 scripture verses memorized to pray with and bless
someone who needs to hear God’s word!
v
Look for someone to bless. If you have toll booths, by the person behind
you their toll. Leave cookies in your
mail for your mail carrier. Take some desserts to your military recruiter
offices and bless those in service to the country, take the same to your police
and fire stations! Visit your local nursing home once a week. These were all things I did with my children
for years.
v
Lay out food for dinner to thaw first thing in
the morning.
v
Deep clean a room a day, while whipping down
bathrooms and counters.
v
One load of laundry, dishes out of dishwasher
started in the morning.
v
Mondays, I do my grocery shopping for the week,
which means I have planned out what we are having on the weekend.
v
If you work, get up a few minutes early, put a
load of laundry in and when you get home, put in the dryer. You can have one load of laundry done a day.
v
If you work, get up a few minutes early, clean
one room. If you deep clean, 15 minutes
is all you need.
v
Clean kitchen sink the night before. It’s not pleasant looking at smelly dishes
and hard food first thing in the morning.
v
If you have older children, get them doing
chores and follow thru with them helping and working around the house.
v
More work can get done if the television is OFF,
phones are down and house is quiet. Take this time to focus on memorizing
scriptures and praying to God.
v
There are great websites for planning menus,
organizing your house or cleaning schedules.
Print them, place them where they are visible and follow through with
them!
v
Cut coupons and plan how much you are going to
spend at the grocery store, and get your children involved. Kids will appreciate dinner time,
preparation, shopping and cooking if you let them use their hands. Not only
will they like to cook, but they will KNOW
HOW!
v
Search a few minutes on the internet for your
grocery stores sales items. Our store
here has a website and lists their buy one get ones each week. Plan your dinner meals around those
items. If barbeque sauce is on sale for
BOGO, then grab two, four or how ever many and find a good BBQ dinner
recipe.
v
I have learned the best time to shop, for me, is
the morning before the crowds. Get up
and go! If you have babies and small children, schedule shopping and outings
before nap time with plenty of snacks and small toys to play with. Your life WILL be easier!
v
Print chore charts for kids Monday –Saturday.
Have them mark each chore when finished.
Yes, they should get some reward.
v
Find ways to bless your husband – make his
favorite meal, have his clothes ironed or pressed ready to wear. Send him a
text telling him something nice, encourage him when he’s home, spend time
watching a ball game with him. Pray over him if he allows you to, wear
something he likes to see you out in.
Cut or color your hair the way he likes it, he’s the one who has to look
at it! Show him affection every time that you can and let him see his wife in
all your nakedness. If Tommy is full of
seeing me when ever he wants, he doesn’t have that need to look else where or
is able turn his head when unclothed women are around.
v
Teach your children the ways of the Lord.
Saturate their life with God; you will saturate their life with something,
either God or this world. My children
went to church twice a week, a Christian school, prayed and had Christian music
on all night long. They were not able to
go to sleep if the “Jesus music” wasn’t on.
These are the beginnings of molding and shaping young lives to desire
the things of God. Have prayer time and
make yourself available to them to talk.
v
Eat dinner together and pray at the table
whether you are out to dinner or at home. The children will see your
faithfulness in public and behind closed doors.
v
Follow through with discipline.
v
Stay of internet and television as much as you
can.
v
Get involved in your church.
v
Pay off credit cards.
v
Do as much as you can the night before school,
work or events. You will be so thankful
the next day. Lay out clothes, pack lunches,
backpacks ready, suitcases packed, etc.
There will be no rushing and frustration in the morning.
v
.Do not eat too much junk! Clouds the mind.
v
Take a walk with fresh air, thank God you can
see, hear and have the ability to move around.
v
Thank the Lord for everything!
v
If you do not have anything nice to stay, DO NOT
SAY IT! I have said things that were unkind and backfired on me. People’s feelings were hurt and I felt
terrible. Stop gossiping and read the
book of James. Mediate on that for a
month.
v
Read the Bible every day.
v
Rest, get sleep!
v
Wear clothes that cover you.
Christian, these are just a few
things that I implemented during those years I prayed and asked God to mold
me. These are small things you can start
now to begin becoming this wife of noble character. I pray you give this area of your life to
Christ. You will never regret a one day of it.
My sister in Christ, let’s lay our
hearts at the cross. Let us kneel before
Christ as Mary of Bethany, anointing our Savior with a sweet prayer, offering
ourselves as noble wives. Let us ask
Yeshua to strengthen us to be these women of faith, giving us the grace to
accomplish all tasks through Him and the power of His resurrection.
Pray OUT loud and
CONFESS the Word of God
Father,
I give you thanks this day that I
can come before you as your daughter asking to become better. I want to break the alabaster jar over any
area of my life that is hindering me from becoming a Proverbs 31 woman (Mark 14:3, John 12:3). Quicken my spirit as to any area where the
scales have blinded me from seeing the truth (Acts 9:18). Father, if I
need to forgive my husband, show me how to love him again (Matthew 5:14). If I am
holding bitterness, show me how to let go (Ephesians
4:31). If I have become lazy and demand
my own way, strength me to diligently work hard and be self controlled enough,
to love my family enough, and to love you enough making it a priority (Galatians 5:22-25) .
If I have never been taught how to
be this noble wife, I pray for godly women counselors and elders I can learn
from. I pray I can observe my sisters in
Christ and learn the ways of the Lord.
Help me to read and memorize scripture daily, putting you first in every
area of my life. Help me to put off my
old self and cloth myself with Jesus Christ, knowing I can accomplish all
things through him who gives me strength (Luke
5:36-38).
May I be a woman who thinks ahead,
prepares for the future and my children (Colossians
3:23-24). My I leave them not only a
financial inheritance, but a spiritual one as well. I pray to teach them the ways of the Lord and
when they are old, they will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6). May I be a
wise woman, able to give a word when needed for counsel and encouragement (Ephesians 5:19-20). I pray my reputation be full of grace, and
not worldly gossip, slander or selfishness (Ephesians 4:29).
I pray that I am able to give of
myself to your service and those who are in need. Help me to teach my children to love those
who can not take care of themselves. I
pray they watch as I lead by example in all biblical wisdom, hard work, and
generosity (Colossians 1:10-12). May my children respect and love their
mother, who especially my daughter, can learn from and my boys seek another
noble wife of excellent character (Ephesians
5:1).
Lord, I pray my marriage is glorifying to you. May my husband be able to call me a noble
wife, one who he loves and cherishes; one who he is proud of and has full
confidence in. I praise you Lord and the
glory to your name. I ask this prayer in the name of Jesus of Nazareth I pray, Amen.